"Where else would you go when you have an ax to grind?"

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Blonde hair, brown shirts
Not content with using schoolyard bullying tactics and eliminationist rhetoric against those on the left, Ann "the man" Coulter, is now using goons against other conservatives. Of course while the cable talking heads and major news outlets are dicussing Ann's latest calculated outrage, crap like this is being ignored by most.

"How can you have the mess we have in New Orleans, and not have had deep
investigations of the federal government, the state government, the city
government, and the failure of citizenship in the Ninth Ward, where 22,000
people were so uneducated and so unprepared, they literally couldn't get out of
the way of a hurricane"
Newt Gingrich at CPAC

Coulter knows what she's doing. She grabs the headlines with some hateful bile, her comments get discussed in the mainstream media, conservatives tut-tut about her "outrageous" languague while endorsing her point of view in more carefully couched terminology and presto! the formerly fringe opinion gets lots of mainstream airtime and ink and comes to be considered reasonable.

She also acts as a smokescreen for people like Gingrich. Not matter how offensive his carefully phrased nonsense is, all he has to do is point out that at least he didn't call John Edwards a faggot.

tip of the hat to Lindsey at Majikthise and as always, go read the Galloping Beaver and Orcinus

Presented without comment
I have kids to feed and house payments to make so I'm not going to talk about the Japanese media vis a vis Prime Minister Abe's comments on the WWII Comfort Women/Sex Slaves, but I think it is important that people see this editorial from the largest Japanese newspaper. It is about what I expected. The Galloping Beaver has a nice post on this issue.

Sunday, March 04, 2007

Don't mention the war
"I mentioned it once, but I think I got away with it"
Continued employment precludes my commenting at length in the manner I would like to, but suffice to say those of you reading the Times, the Post and the Globe and Mail will read much more about these controversies than anyone in Tokyo will.

Gov. Shintaro Ishihara pens script on Kamakazi pilots -- just google his name to see whether this is likely to be a good idea.

Abe says "comfort women" weren't coerced -- Yeah, those 14 year olds were just asking for it, the trollops.

Education minister claims too many human rights are like too much butter and could soil Japanese purity, proposes stressing patriotic education in school system.

War crimes still coming to light

Saturday, March 03, 2007


The hills are alive with the sound of merciless imperialistic hegemony

Accidentally, my eye! I always suspected those Swiss were up to something. For centuries they've tried to lull the world into a false sense of security with their fondue, chocolate, cuckoo clocks and watches -- and that damn Julie Andrews movie. And all the while they've been arming terrorists, militants and malcontents around the world with military weapons, acting as banker to the world's dictators and criminals, and worst of all, yodeling.

For centuries,they have provided an army of mercenaries as personal guards to shore up the regime of the world's most notorious religious fanatic, who claims to god's infallible voice on earth and who rules over a theocratic dictatorship. And yet, they never fought the Kaiser or Hitler - they didn't even join the UN until 2002, claiming it might compromise their precious so-called neutrality. Ha! tell that to the freedom loving people of Liechtenstien, you bloodthirsty rosti-eating, tyrolean-hat wearing bastards!

Through stealth and trickery, they've already tried to make Geneva the center of their one-world government. They've successfully infiltrated Canada using a restaurant chain as a front; "Taste it once, love it forever" -- nice way of describing the addictive mind-control drugs they put in that sauce. But now it's all out in the open:

Filed at 11:13 p.m. ET

ZURICH, Switzerland (AP) -- What began as a routine training exercise almost ended in an embarrassing diplomatic incident after a company of Swiss soldiers got lost at night and marched into neighboring Liechtenstein.

According to Swiss daily Blick, the 170 infantry soldiers wandered just over a mile across an unmarked border into the tiny principality early Thursday before realizing their mistake and turning back.

A spokesman for the Swiss army confirmed the story but said that there were unlikely to be any serious repercussions for the mistaken invasion.

Obviously nukes are the only way to deal with this threat, otherwise the next thing you know we'll all be forced to toot alpenhorns, eat musili and speak French, German and Italian. The horror.

Thursday, March 01, 2007

Swiftboater on the rocks
Remember back in 2004, when "swiftboating" became shorthand for flinging enough total horseshit that some was bound to stick to a candidate? George W. Bush and his merry crew of slimeballs seem to have forgotten that while the American public has a short memory, John Kerry doesn't. The GOP saw fit to name Sam Fox as Ambassador to Belgium, a man who donated $50,000 to the lying character assassins at Swiftboat Veterans For Truth. What they also forgot is that ambassadors have to be confirmed by the Senate, of which Kerry is still a member.

Oooops.

The testimony is hilarious, with Fox trying to wheedle, flatter and squirm his way through with "the-dog-ate-my-homework" level excuses about giving them the money even though he thinks Kerry is hero because they asked for it and can't actually remember who asked him to do it. Think Jon Lovitz's Tommy Flannigan being cross-examined by Perry Mason.

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Best. Lede. Ever.
The only thing missing is a politician and a domestic animal of some sort.
"A jazz musician was injured Friday after jumping from a burning motor home driven by a one-time roller skating stripper from Lodi."

Fresh meat
Welcome to the blogroll Kung Fu Monkey, to whom we have linked before and who has the definitive smackdown of FOX's "comedy" program, "The Half Hour News Hour" -- he links to the opening. I'm not saying I have high standards, but linking to that kinda stuff is where I draw the line.

Jake Gittes: I wouldn't extort a nickel from my worst enemy. That's where I draw the line.
Loach Jr.
: Well, I'll tell you, Jake. I knew a whore once. For the right amount of money, she'd piss in a guy's face. But she wouldn't shit on his chest. You see, that's where she drew the line.
Jake Gittes: Well, Junior, all I can say is: I hope she wasn't too much of a disappointment to you.

Monday, February 26, 2007

The Age of Dumb
As ususal, we had CNN on in the newsroom today and I was, as usual, reminded just how crappy the "News Network of Record" usually is. Larry King was on, taking a break from his breathless "coverage" of Anna Nicole Smith and promotion of American Idol to lob softballs to Laura "the Joker" Bush, followed by a short interview with James Cameron about whether researchers (and I use that term in the loosest possible sense) had actually found the actual tomb of the actual Jesus.

This lead into a segment on "Mysteries of the Bible" with former MuchMusic VJ and senior CNN hair model John "JD" Roberts exploring the usual parade of long since debunked religious based scams - the shroud of Turin, the search for Noah's Ark etc etc - while a constant computer graphic scrolled the words "faith" "religion" and "Jesus" in a quasi-subliminal way in the sceen margin.

The sound was off so I can't say for sure that Roberts wasn't ridiculing the notion that Noah Ark was for real, but given the tenor of the discussion on Larry King, in which the only person he really seemed to challenge was the scientist who was rightfully contemptuous of the notion of "proving" it was Jesus and Mary Magdelene in the tomb through DNA testing, and the current fear in the media of offending any nutbar's oh-so-sacred religious sensibilities, I'll go out on a limb and guess that his was not the skeptical point of view. The King show transcript for the Jesus tomb James Cameron segment isn't available yet, but you can find his hard-hitting interview with the first lady here.

However, lest you think it is just something in the water in the USA, CNN brings us this gem from South Korea on how children are learning that Jews control the United States.

I guess my biggest complaint about CNN and the 24-hour cable news horrorshows in general is that they constantly pander to the lowest common denominator (yeah, yeah I know, it's TV -- what the hell did I expect) with mindless celebrity worship, fearmongering sensationalist crime stories, unspeakably shallow analysis of complex issues, the not so subtle reinforcement of the notion that having money makes you smart and important and the non-stop dumbing down of western culture. If the 24-hour cable news station were the irrelevant sideshow they seem to aspire to be, such a lack of serious news content would be one thing, but the problem is that they now set the public agenda in United States and to a lesser extent the Western world as a whole.

As Jon Stewart so famously said to Tucker Carlson and Paul Begalla "Stop, stop, stop, stop hurting America"

Monday, February 19, 2007

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes
Some updating going on in the blogroll and elsewhere. We bid a sorrowful adieu to three fantastic blogs: Michael Berube, Billmon's Whisky Bar and I am Eating My Husband's Soul. All three seem to have retired from the blogosphere and we are all the poorer for it. Prof. Berube, as a prominent academic and semiprofessional pundit, can still be read here and there, and we can only pray that Billmon will come back someday (or that the New York Times will come to its senses and use him to replace the odious David Brooks) ---I don't know what happened to the author of I am Eating My Husband's Soul, but I suspect legal trouble with the Denny's chain could conceivably been involved.
In their place, we bring you Indexed, where you can find math and chart comedy along the lines of the this:



A list of good Japan blogs is in the making and I'm also looking into adding a list of podcasts, so if you have suggestions, by all means leave them in the comments.

Additionally, we have joined Blogshares -- a sort of stock market game where blogs are substituted for companies. Dave Monroe of the must-read Dave's Snarky Northern Canadian Blog (see blogroll) has generously given me his holdings in The Woodshed, which I will be splitting with him as long as he doesn't mind me trying to acquire a few more shares in his joint. So click on the link and come and drive up the share price --- we'll all get rich I tell ya! Fabulously wealthy!

Sunday, February 18, 2007

And you just know they voted Republican
Some people really never get past the mental age of three and still think the universe revolves around them. Follow the link and scroll way down to read about people who think the notion that the Earth revolves around the sun, or that it moves at all is based on Jewish Kabbalistic propaganda and responsible for the French Revolution and Communism. No, really.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

And for my next trick: loaves and fishes!
by way of Canadian Cynic, just because it gave me a much needed laugh before work

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Kanadian Korner #3
Good Day eh!

Friday, February 09, 2007

Come back Chevy, all is forgiven
the Woodshed salutes CNN announcer and smart ass Jack Cafferty .
Up next on Point/Counter Point, Lou Dobbs calls Paula Zahn an ignorant slut, Soledad O'Brian will have a commentary on "Sax and Violins on Television," Richard Quest will present the news for the hard of hearing and Father Guido Sarducci will have a report from the Vatican. That's the news, Goodnight, and have a pleasant tomorrow.

Vigilantes by any other name still stink

Given what has been going on in Arizona, I don't think it is a huge jump to think this could be the work of fellow travelers of the Minutemen. Gee, a bunch of bigots start spouting hate, prompting a bunch of other bigots to start waving guns around and another bunch of bigots start shooting people. What were the freakin' odds? The last line of the article in the second link is telling -- human smugglers shooting people out in the desert are unlikely to be wearing something as dramatic as berets. Anything that theatrical sounds to me like a bunch of uber-patriot military fetishists turned vigilante. Doubtless the freepers can explain to us how it was all the fault of the vicitims for seeking a better life in the first place instead of staying where they were and working for some mega-corporation's dirty little branch plant for a dollar a day.

In other news from Stupidville, 25 percent of Americans think Jesus will return this year. And that is according to an Associated Press poll, not a survey of members of the 700 club. If you are an American reading this, just remember that one of the next three people you meet is likely to think the rapture is going to occur in the next 10 months. So don't lend them any money.

Thursday, February 08, 2007

"Tokyo - city of violent degenerate foreigners"

This is a magazine which just came out in Japan, "Gaijin Hanzai Ura Fairu" the translated title of which is "Foreigners Underground Crime Files" (your translations may vary).

I'll rant later, first have a look at some of the contents. As is usual with these sort of incidents in Japan, Debito Arudou has done all the heavy lifting for us lazy foreign parasites.


Here is an image from one of the chapters, that I think indicates both the tone and quality of this charming piece of racist trash:

The text reads: "Oi Nigger!! Get your fuckin' hands off that Japanese lady's ass!!"

Other highlights:

Article about crimes by Iranians:
イラン人を捕まえ!!
Catch the Iranian!!

Article lamenting Tokyo’s demise into lawlessness:
不良外人暴力都市!!
City of Violent Degenerate Foreigners!!

Article about foreigners scamming Japanese for money:
毟られる日本人。『シャチョサン、ATMコッチデス』
Japanese getting conned. “Theesaway to ze ATM, Meester Managing Director”

Feature of foreign guys picking up Japanese women (What this has to do with ‘crime’ is unclear)
YELLOW CAB REAL STREET PHOTO
お前らそんなに外人がイイのかよ!!
You sluts really think foreign guys are so great, huh!!
そりゃあ日本人は小さいけど。。
We know Japanese guys are small, but..



On its own it is appalling, but what is more appalling still is the societal acceptance of such a magazine. It isn't sold at some seedy neofascist bookstore tucked away on a side street in the redlight district or anything like that. It originally went on sale at the Family Mart chain and other major convenience stores. It isn't some obscure little rag no one will ever see, it is mainstream media. Both Debito and Japan Probe are calling for a boycott of stores selling the magazine, which seems to working

Gaijin is a bit of a nasty word. Somewhere between gringo and nigger, it is still a common, if impolite term used to refer to foreigners in Japan. My "Foreign Resident Registration Card" is generally referred to by anyone outside a government office as my "gaijin card." Many Japanese and even newly arrived expats don't even recognize it as an offensive term and a lot of expats will use it to refer to themselves and their foreign friends.

Those who don't live here may not realize that Japan has its own aparthied system. Many bars, restaurants, clubs, public baths and other establishments do not allow non-Japanese on the excuse that our inability to speak language or understand the rules will cause problems. People of Korean descent in Japan - many of whom are second, third and even fourth generation residents born and raised here and most often descendants of slave laborers brought to Japan during its colonial occupation of the Korean Penninsula before and during WWII - cannot become citizens.

It is an article of common wisdom in Japan that foreigners, especially Koreans and Chinese, and increasingly Iranians and Africans, are responsible for most of the crime in the country, a bit of common wisdom that the facts simply do not support.

"Japan's crime rate is one of the world's lowest at 1,776 reported crimes per 100,000 people in 2005, according to the latest government statistics. The number of crimes among Japan's 2 million foreign residents in 2005 was 2,380 per 100,000.

Offenses by foreigners rose to a record high of 47,865 in 2005, from 47,128 a year earlier and 40,615 in 2003, according to police statistics. The number of non-Japanese arrested is also rising, to 21,178 in 2005 from 20,007 two years earlier.

The statistics don't break out visa-related offenses, which in 2003 accounted for 46 percent of crimes committed by foreigners. By their nature such breaches can't be committed by Japanese citizens.

Japan's overall crime rate in 2003 was 2,185 per 100,000 and 2,120 among foreigners. Excluding visa offences, the rate was 1,570 per 100,000 foreigners."

(source: Bloomberg News)

Big black buses decorated with Hinomaru and rising sun military flags, blaring loud martial music and slogans ("revere the emperor and expel the barbarians" is a favorite) are a fairly common sight in Tokyo. They are operated by ultra-nationalist groups, which are in turn funded by the Yakuza often as a way to launder money. Such groups are major supporters of the rightist conservative factions of the ruling LDP party and have been known to physically attack politicians and journalists who disagree with them. As a result, they are rarely mentioned in the mainstream press.

Rampant racism, sexism and militant nationalism are the 800 pound rhinos in the living room of Japanese politics. Everyone knows they are there, but feel it would be impolite to mention them.
Here is a more comprehensive account of this horrible racist magazine (with other discussions of the same issue here, here, here, here and here)

The scary part is that this is just the latest manifestation of a much larger problem. You will notice that none of sites linked to are Japanese newspapers or other media. That's because the Japanese media has yet to mention this magazine, which is put out by a sizable publisher, or the fact that a major convenience store chain was willing to carry it in its hundreds of stores nationwide. Not even the English-language press which caters to foreign and foreigner-friendly readers.

I am frustrated, ashamed and embarrassed by this. I've lived in this country for nearly ten years now, and most of the Japanese I've met are the nicest, kindest, most open-hearted and hospitable people you could ever hope to meet. I'm sure most (probably all, at least I hope so) of my native Japanese friends would be equally appalled by this collection of racist claptrap -- I once had a total stranger apologize to me for his fellow citizens after one of the hate-blaring black buses went past in the street. But there seems to be this societal blind spot when it comes to foreigners, especially non-European ones. The not-so-subtle encouragement of this attitude in the mainstream media here, both Japanese and English-language is reprehensible. All that is required for evil to succeed, is for good men to do nothing.

Yokoso Japan, indeed

Monday, February 05, 2007

Vocal minorities

While doing some quick research on the religious make-up of India to fact-check a story our paper was running, I was surprised to find that Christians, comprising 2.3 percent of the population, outnumber Sikhs (1.9 percent) Buddhists (0.8 percent) and Jains (0.4 percent) in India. The second largest group is Muslims (13.4 percent) with the dominant Hindu faith comprising 80.5 percent of the population (all figures are for 2001).

Casting about on the web for a similar set of figures for Canada, I was pleasantly surprised to learn that the second largest "religious" grouping in Canada is atheist/agnostic/no religion.
Looking at the census data it is clear that not only is Canada becoming less Christian-dominated in terms of overall demographics, but that the bible-thumping literalist fundementalist Christian denominations are shrinking faster than the more liberal Christian faiths like the United Church.

We are still mostly Christian, with the Roman Catholic Church predominant at 43 percent of the population as a whole (cough Quebec cough) but the reality based community is number two with a bullet, doubling to about 16 percent of the population since 1981. The evangelical, apostolic and born-again churches have also doubled their following --- and here's the real kicker --- to a whopping 2.5 percent. That's right, in contrast to the U.S. where this group is growing at an alarming rate, there just aren't that many of them in Canada - 780,000 in 2001. So even if you include the other conservative leaning Christian faiths - the Jehovah's Witnesses, the Mormons, the Baptists (and Canadian Baptists are to Southern Baptists as Peewee hockey stars are to Wayne Gretzky) the numbers of the faithful still don't come close to the number of people who ticked the "none of the above" box for religion on the 2001 census. Suck on that you Focus on the Family, queer-hating, home-skoolin', what-about-the-children-for-God's-sake-what-about-the-children, Rapture-awaiting, book-banning, pulpit-pounding thickhead true believers.

Now would someone please explain to me why this tiny group of very vocal Christian cultist seem to have Stephen Harper's nutsack in a death-grip? Surely if you want to court the largest voting blocs in the country your priorities are the French Catholics, followed by the WASAA's (White Anglo-Saxon atheists and agnostics) and Christian liberals in the United Church.

So why do the Fundamentalists wield so much power in Ottawa and other centers of government.? Why do they have their own TV channels and carry so much weight with school boards and local governments? Why don't we pay them so much heed and the large chunk of the population that has no strong interest in religion so little? Is it because atheists tend to be lone wolves politically, running the full political spectrum from neofascist right-wing libertarian traditionalists to commie pinko anarchists to live-and-let-live libertarian liberals, while fundamentalist congregations tend to be flocks of voting sheep?

Follow the link for a whole bunch of interesting facts and figures about how Canada does religion.

The top ten:

Roman Catholic 12.8 million 43.2% of the population

No religion 4.8 million 16.2%

United Church 2.8 million 9.6%

Anglican 2.0 million 6.9%

Other Christian, 780 thousand 2.6%
Apostolic,
Born-again,
Evangelical

Baptist 729 thousand 2.5%

Lutheran 607 thousand 2.0%

Muslim 580 thousand 2.0%

Other Protestant 549 thousand 1.9%

Presbyterian 410 thousand 1.4%

For the record, Jews, Sikhs and Buddhists each comprised about 1 percent of the population.
All figures from the 2001 census, as compiled by Religious Tolerance.org, who have it all laid out in a nice chart at the link above.

Another interesting tidbit:"About 37% of people in the Yukon, 35% in British Columbia, and 23% in Alberta reported no religion. This compares to 6% in Quebec, and fewer than 2% in Newfoundland & Labrador."

I can understand how spending winters in the Yukon might convince you that there is no God, but 23 percent of people Alberta, usually portrayed as Canada's Bible belt, rejecting organized religion was a bit of a shock.

Saturday, February 03, 2007

McCarthy does some

hard traveling on 'The Road'

The Road

Cormac McCarthy

Picador, 241 Pages, 24 dollars

Bleak, desolate, cheerless, barren, joyless, disheartening--there are over a dozen synonyms in the thesaurus, but none of them really do justice to Cormac McCarthy's stark, dark vision of postapocalyptic America put forth in The Road.

And yet, amid the cold ashes of a nuclear winter, McCarthy shows us a tiny, glowing ember of hope in the love between a father and son and the purity of a small boy's heart.

In an ash-covered world of eternal twilight and biting cold, where nothing grows and the living often envy the desiccated corpses that litter the landscape, a nameless, tubercular father and his sickly young son travel the highways of the Northeastern United States, heading south and east. Their goal is the distant coast, where they hope in vain that things will be better somehow. Masked against the drifting ash, their meagre possessions piled in a shopping cart, the two trek on, scavenging canned food, tools and clothing where they are able and dodging gangs of cannibalistic bandits and slavers. Their only protection from such marauders is a revolver with just enough ammunition to take their own lives. Their only safeguard against the constant specter of death from starvation and cold is each other.

It is about as cheerful as it sounds. McCarthy's greatest strength as a writer is not his plots or characters, but the atmosphere he creates through artful minimalist descriptions and sparse narration. The atmosphere here is forbidding, to say the least.

At the same time, in a strange way, The Road may be McCarthy's warmest, most emotional work. The contrast between the bleak, hopeless landscape of a dying Earth and the tenderness for each other displayed by the father and son is heartrending.

McCarthy describes the two as "each the other's world entire" and it is clear that while it is the man who keeps the boy alive by foraging for food, building fires and protecting him from human predators, the father needs the son as much or even more than the son needs a provider and protector. The man, like the rest of the world, is dying and knows it, but goes to great pains to keep hope alive in the boy that things will get better. Despite having abandoned any pretense of morality in their fight for survival, the man draws strength from his son's insistence on kindness to strangers and faith that the parent and child are "the good guys." In an utterly amoral world, the boy is his father's moral compass, keeping him from following the rest of the world into savagery. At one point the child pleads for the life of a starving stranger who has stolen all their possessions, convincing the father to let the man go free after they have reclaimed their food and meagre equipment:

"He was just hungry, Papa. He's going to die.

He's going to die anyway.

He's so scared, Papa.

The man squatted and looked at him. I'm scared, he said. Do you understand? I'm scared.

The boy didn't answer. He just sat there with his head bowed, sobbing.

You're not the one who has to worry about everything.

The boy said something but he couldn't understand him. What? he said.

He looked up, his wet and grimy face. Yes I am, he said. I am the one."


Indeed, the boy is the personification of all the good left in the man's world. His wife has given in to despair and taken her own life, and every vestige of the old world is gone. He stays alive only to make sure the boy survives and does not despair.

The two live a life of almost complete immediacy. For them there is no future but the vague aim of reaching the coast and, for the boy at least, no memory of the past except for a hazy recollection of his dead mother.

McCarthy's spare prose matches the barren landscape of the novel. It is stripped even of much of the punctuation--there are no quotation marks and precious few commas or apostrophes. Like Hemingway, McCarthy pares his writing down to the barest essentials, purging it of descriptive excess and extended metaphor until it becomes akin to prose poetry. One can open the book and chose a passage almost at random and see McCarthy's mastery of rhythm and imagery:

"In those first years the roads were peopled with refugees shrouded up in their clothing. Wearing masks and goggles, sitting in their rags by the side of the road like ruined aviators. Their barrows heaped with shoddy. Towing wagons or carts. Their eyes bright in their skulls. Creedless shells of men tottering down the causeways like migrants in a feverland. The frailty of everything revealed at last. Old and troubling issues resolved into nothingness and night. The last instance of a thing takes the class with it. Turns out the light and is gone. Look around you. Ever is a long time. But the boy knew what he knew. That ever is no time at all."

Unlike Hemingway--whose entire body of work probably comprises a lexicon of no more than a few thousand words and only a few hundred of those of more than three syllables--McCarthy has a clear affection for using obscure but appropriate terminology. The man descends to a "gryke" in the stone of a mountainside; a roaming bandit army is accompanied by a "consort of catamites"; the man and boy are described as "mendicant friars."

Despite the gloom and doom, the book is ultimately uplifting and even moving, without descending into mawkish sentimentality or emotionalism. McCarthy is one of the most skilled writers working today, and The Road shows him at the top of his form.

(Feb. 3, 2007)