"Where else would you go when you have an ax to grind?"

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

From the desk of Sen. John McCain

Dear crazy Jesus freaks Friends at inJesus.com

I know I said I wanted your help to become president and continue to carry out the Lord's work just the way our beloved President Bush has done. I even picked one of your own as my running mate to try to buy your loyalty. I know you sincerely believe all this stuff and can quote me chapter and verse in the Scriptures to support your belief. But here's the thing: Most people in America are base sinners who don't understand the threat that witches and satanism actually pose, in fact most of them think Spiritual Warfare is the stuff of cheesy horror movies and the sorts of games with all the books and dice those weird, nerdy kids in high school used to play. I'm trying to win an election here people, so I as much as I appreciate your prayers and other efforts to fight Nigerian witchcraft on my behalf, do you think you could kind of keep it on the down low?
Thanks
your pal in Jesus,
Sen. John McCain

H/T the Wingnutterer

1 comment:

BadTux said...

Witches. In the 21st century.

Wow. Just wow.

These folks are stuck back in the Dark Ages, methinks. The sad thing is that they're just breeding and breeding and breeding, all of these religious freeks have, like, ninety kids or something, and they're all receiving welfare out the wazoo. It's pathetic, how they rant about big government while sucking on the government teat...

- Badtux the non-crazy Penguin