"Where else would you go when you have an ax to grind?"

Showing posts with label no it isn't an April Fools prank it's my life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label no it isn't an April Fools prank it's my life. Show all posts

Friday, March 19, 2010

the way it's going

I could not be more grateful to the most excellent Seattle Tammy and Seattle Dan aka Bookem & Dano, proprieters of Jackson Street Books for the gift they included in my Christmas shipment - an autographed copy of "The Financial Lives of The Poets" - a novel of considerable excellence and humor. However, I may not have picked the most auspicious time to be reading it as it rings a little too close to home at times, what with having only another week left at work before plunging into the abyss and all that.
I had a moment of head-meets-table this morning when picking it up over my steaming morning cup of maple syrup and turning to the new chapter to find this bit of poesy from author Jess Walter:


Chapter 7
The Last Days of the 
Newspaper Business

I dreamed  I was on my bike, delivering the last paper
to the final porch and I tossed that rag at least a mile --
last dream of a democratic process -- and the end of the papers 
fell like a snowflake on the faded wood planks
of my old man's porch, and came out in slippers, 
picked it up, slipped off the rubber band -- and the thing
exploded with fresh despairs: new Vietnams and 
Watergates, Mansons and Patty Hearsts, not to mention
Andy Capp and Hi and Lois, horoscopes, a Crossword puzzle,
box scores -- even the obit of my poor mother. And
my old man told me not to cry, that even good things die, 
son, and he folded that paper back up and tucked
the only good thing I ever did under his arm, easing back 
into the warm house of my dead childhood to take 
his morning shit. 

Tuesday, January 05, 2010

Just resting

Rumours about the death of my industry have been greatly only slightly exaggerated.

...And now for something completely predictable, starring John Cleese as the internet, Eric Idle as 24 hour cable news and the scrappy John Young as Journalism!

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

The Horror, the HORROR!!

Nevermind the wars, the economic collapse or even the imminent (OMG) maybe-it's-a-satellite-maybe-it's-a-nuke (SHRIEK! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!) rocket launch by North Korea, Japan's largest national daily newspaper, the biggest newspaper in the world, knows horror and know what kind of information its 10 million readers crave:

School baseball player insulted rivals on blog
The Yomiuri Shimbun
A high school student who participated in the current National High School Invitational Baseball Tournament posted comments insulting one of his team's opponents on his blog, prompting complaints to be made to his school, it has been learned.
Though the student quickly deleted the comments, the manager of his baseball team said the school was considering apologizing to the rival team and reporting the matter to the Japan High School Baseball Federation.
According to the school and its baseball team, the student posted insulting comments about his opponents, such as: "They all look ugly. (Laugh out loud)." and "They look like they're from the Showa era [1926-1989]."
His school received several complaints by e-mail on the day of the game and afterward, one of which said the comments were inconsiderate.


Heavens to Mugatroid, someone is being mean on the Internets! We must alert the populace! Won't someone think of the children?

Ask not why the humble inkstained wretch drinks, ask why it doesn't drink more.

UPDATE: Stop the presses! We have a scoop! Breaking news! Read all about it! Extra! Extra! Knob says something mean and stupid on the Internet! Oh my stars and garters, will this unendurable horror never end? Someone push me toward the couch, I feel faint!

Asahi Shimbun employee posted offensive remarks

The Yomiuri Shimbun
A 49-year-old male employee of The Asahi Shimbun's Tokyo headquarters posted discriminatory remarks about historically marginalized communities on an Internet bulletin board, the newspaper company said Tuesday.
According to the company, the employee, from the editorial bureau's proofreading department, repeatedly posted messages seen as encouraging discrimination against marginalized communities and people with mental disorders on the popular online bulletin board "2 channel." All of his messages were composed and posted using a company computer during working hours.
A spokesperson for the company said the man had admitted to writing the messages after his postings had drawn attention from readers of the bulletin board.
"[The tone of the postings] intensified during an exchange with another person. I've done something bad," the man was quoted as saying during an internal investigation.

(Sniff, sniff) Can you smell that? It smells like ......Pulitzer!

And we wonder why circulation is dropping. I've checked the gauges and the dipstick and I think I'm down a quart -- pass the scotch.